Herself Parent Guide

If “home is where the heart is” what happens when you have no home?

Following a violent domestic assault, Sandra (Clare Dunne) fled with her young daughters (Molly McCann and Ruby Rose O’Hara) to the safety of a government-funded room in a hotel by the Dublin airport. Struggling to get her children to school and to make it to her jobs on time, Sandra is desperately seeking affordable housing in a more convenient location. After checking out filthy, sub-standard rent-controlled apartments, Sandra comes up with a solution – building her own small house. But to succeed, she’s going to have to fight the existing welfare system and find people willing to help with this mammoth task.

Herself is more than just a single issue film. Not only does it expose the human cost of a shortage in affordable housing; it also examines in unsparing detail a victim-blaming culture that makes it so difficult for survivors of domestic assault to leave their marriages and get back on their feet. Fighting in court to keep custody of her children, Sandra fires back at the judge, “You sit me in the same room with him, ask me questions like “Why didn’t you leave him?” but you never ask “Why didn’t he stop?’”

With her grit, honesty, and bone-deep love for her children, Sandra is an incredibly sympathetic character. Clare Dunne portrays her with emotional authenticity and is just one of the many superb performers in the film. She is ably supported by Molly McCann and Ruby Rose O’Hara, who are completely convincing and manage to give Molly and Emma distinct personalities and believable emotions – a rarity in young performers. The film’s production values are pleasantly unremarkable. They don’t stand out but neither do they get in the way of the cast.

Not surprisingly, a story about the fallout of domestic assault comes with violent content issues that might be triggering to some viewers. There is a brutal attack involving kicking and stomping that is seen several times in flashback and there is also a shocking criminal act that will gut-punch viewers. Throw in four dozen profanities, and this isn’t a movie that everyone’s going to want to watch.

On the flip side, Herself also comes with some big pluses. It’s a moving depiction of the power and beauty of maternal love and determination. It also speaks to our need for community and is a reminder that it doesn’t just take a village to raise a child; it can also take a village to house one. The best description of the film’s message comes from an Irish term shared by Aido (Conlet Hill), a builder who spends weekends supervising the construction. Celebrating the completion of the house, Aido reminds everyone of meitheal – when people come together to help each other and by doing that are helped in return. It’s a reminder that not only do children need a village but that those of us in that village need each other.