Movie Ratings, Family Movie Reviews & More!

Vampires Suck


Aug 18, 2010

Latest Home Video

Nov 30, 2010

MPAA Rating



Jason Friedberg, Aaron Seltzer


Jenn Proske
Matt Lanter
Diedrich Bader
Chris Riggi


2010 Twentieth Century Fox Film Corporation

Official Website >>

Still shot from the movie: Vampires Suck.

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Due to the popularity of the vampire genre, which is epitomized in Twilight Saga, writers/directors Jason Friedberg and Aaron Seltzer have penned a spoof in order to suck more money out of moviegoers' pockets.

Content Details

Why Is Vampires Suck Rated PG-13?

Vampires Suck is rated PG-13 for crude sexual content, comic violence, language and teen partying.

See Canadian Movie Ratings

Here is additional information on sex, violence and profanity in Vampires Suck...

Violence: Characters are frequently hit with objects or subjected to bodily injury during depictions of comedic violence. During a girls’ fight characters are smacked with shovels, wooden planks and other heavy items. One girl is impaled with a pitchfork. Another is attacked and bitten. Two male characters—one in a wheelchair—engage in an exaggerated and brutal fistfight. A boy is hit with a car door. Students throw things at a girl in school, slap her, knock her down, and kick her. A baby is smashed by a bowling ball. One character has his nose severely pushed out of place during a fight. A boy is hit by a car and sustains graphic injuries on his neck and arm. A man is shot with mace, kicked in the groin and has his mustache ripped off. Spurting blood is depicted on a couple of occasions. Scenes of dismemberment and other graphic depictions of injury are shown. A female character repeatedly stabs another girl. Characters engage in dangerous activities. A female character is shot.

Sexual Content: Sexual innuendo is rampant throughout the script. Several crude comments are made about engaging in sexual activity. Anatomical and crude names for male sexual organs are used nearly a half dozen times. A life size sex toy is shown and discussed on two occasions. A father makes an inappropriate comment about his daughter’s breasts. Gay characters are mocked. Two men kiss. A teen couple kisses passionately on a bed. A girl strips down to reveal suggestive sexual attire. One scene portrays sexual sounds. A boy exposes himself to a large crowd: Private body parts are covered in one scene, while male buttock nudity is later included. One character wears a revealing top and another repeatedly removes his shirt.

Language: The script contains one sexual expletive used in a non-sexual context, along with one crude hand gesture. Over two-dozen scatological slangs and curses are heard as well as half a dozen terms of Deity. Other vulgar expressions, derogatory sexual references and ethno-cultural slurs occur more than a dozen times.

Alcohol/Drug Use: Teens are seen driving to their prom with a bottle of alcohol. Adult characters drink from beer cans. Other infrequent portrayals of drinking are shown. Brief references to illegal drugs are made, including use by teens. Characters drink blood from champagne glasses.

Other: A teenage character is treated like an infant. Characters exhibit flatulence. Fingers are served as food.

Home Video Viewing Alternatives

Here are some ideas for home video titles that are related to Vampires Suck.

Finding a family friendly spoof without an excess of crude content can be difficult. However there are a few tamer choices available. The sophisticated world of secret agents becomes a parody in the hands of Johnny English when the clumsy officer becomes the country’s top spy. The Princess Bride combines goofy humor and memorable characters in this spoof of fairytales, medieval knights and maidens in distress. Star Trek and Star Wars fans will appreciate the subtle parody of the space comedy Galaxy Quest.

Trailers & Clips

Canadian Movie Ratings

PG Violence, Coarse Language.
AB 14A Crude Content.
MB 14A Not Recommended for Children, Violence.
ON PG Language May Offend.
QC G Not Recommended for Young Children.

Canadian Home Video Rating: PG

Watch @ Home

Details on home video releases of Vampires Suck...

Vampires Suck is releasing on DVD and Blu-ray on November 30, 2010.

Both DVD and Blu-ray versions offer:

- Theatrical Version of film

- Extended Unrated Version of film

- Deleted Scenes

- Gag Reel

- Theatrical Trailer

Vampires Suck 2-Disc Blu-ray also includes:

- BD Live – What’s New

- Digital Copy of film

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boo9641 says: Aug. 19, 2010

Here’s a sample of what your children are going to hear if they go see the movie “Vampires Suck”- PG13):
Fifteen minutes into the movie….
A father is driving with his daughter and says “You’ve really turned into a fine young lady since I last saw you.” She smiles shyly, and he smiles back; grinning creepily, he looks at her chest and says “I mean just look at your xxxx- they’re huge!”.
Thirty minutes into the movie…...
A girl at school says to another, ” Hi, I’m (whoever) and I’m going to pretend to be your new best friend; but if you xxxx my boyfriend’s xxxx, I’ll cut you!”.
I won’t offend you with any further examples of the crass language in this movie. Here’s the bottom line- this movie is the most offensive thing I have ever seen in a movie theater. EVER. Let me say that once more. EVER. I know that our children are exposed to things we weren’t as children. I know the times have changed and sometimes we as parents need to go with the flow. I myself am a fairly progressive parent. But this movie is just too much.

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