She Came to Me parents guide

She Came to Me Parent Guide

The negative content is hardwired into the script in this wry, compassionate relationship drama.

Overall C+

Theaters: A composer suffering from writer's block sets out in search of inspiration and finds himself entangled in a complicated relationship.

Release date October 6, 2023

Violence B+
Sexual Content C
Profanity D
Substance Use B

Why is She Came to Me rated R? The MPAA rated She Came to Me R for some language

Run Time: 102 minutes

Parent Movie Review

To say that “art imitates life” is an understatement for Steven Lauddem (Peter Dinklage). Crippled by anxiety, the composer has been unable to pen anything following his highly successful opera five years ago. Finally, his exasperated wife, Patricia (Anne Hathaway) orders him to take a walk and clear his head. When his feet turn towards a bar, he encounters Katrina (Marisa Tomei), a tugboat captain with a romance addiction. A fling on her boat kickstarts Steven’s creativity, and he soon composes an opera based on the events of that afternoon.

Movies about tortured artists are a dime a dozen, but She Came to Me wisely broadens its story beyond Steven’s musical challenges. Katrina gets a sympathetic portrayal as a broken person, scarred by past hurts but still capable of kindness. The script makes space for Patricia and looks compassionately at her obsession with cleanliness, organization, and decluttering. She’s not stereotyped as “the controlling wife”; she’s a real person whose need for calm minimalism is pushing her life in new directions. The narrative also expands to include Patricia’s son, Julian (Evan Ellison) and his girlfriend, Tereza (Harlow Jane), whose relationship will bring new challenges to their parents.

This movie demonstrates the perks and perils to having multiple storylines. On the plus side, they flesh out the characters and make the story feel richer. Alternatively, the main story can get lost in the shuffle, which occasionally happens here. If you think of this as an ensemble tale instead of a simple narrative, it’s much easier to enjoy.

Fans of the movie will appreciate the excellent performances delivered by Peter Dinklage and Anne Hathaway. His mournful eyes and her brittle busyness drive home their characters. The script is charmingly quirky and it’s just weird enough not to sink into the beige, bland mold of so many films. The risk with offbeat films is that they often lack mass appeal, and I’m pretty sure She Came to Me isn’t going to be a blockbuster that will dominate the local multiplex and inspire legions of fans.

Also problematic is the film’s negative content, some of which is hardwired into the script. Adultery is a key plot element as is teen sex, with unexpected consequences in both cases. There is no graphic nudity or explicit sexual activity on screen, but couples embrace in bed and sex is implied. The most problematic moment for me is the seduction scene: it raises issues about full and free consent and would likely cause outrage were the sexes reversed. The negative content is particularly disappointing because it strikes a sour note in what could otherwise by a wry, compassionate look at the joys and challenges of human relationships.

Directed by Rebecca Miller. Starring Anne Hathaway, Peter Dinklage, Marisa Tomei. Running time: 102 minutes. Theatrical release October 6, 2023. Updated

Watch the trailer for She Came to Me

She Came to Me
Rating & Content Info

Why is She Came to Me rated R? She Came to Me is rated R by the MPAA for some language

Violence: An ax murder is enacted on a stage with no graphic detail.
Sexual Content: Young man and woman kiss in bed – the man is shirtless. A woman’s nipples are visible through her t-shirt and her stepfather tells her to cover up. A married couple discuss scheduling sex. A woman strips down to lingerie as she propositions a married man: they wind up embracing in a bed and sex is implied. A man says he’s imagining how a woman looks naked. A teenage sexual relationship is characterized as statutory rape. A married woman strips in front of a man (who is not her husband) and her bare back is seen. Photos of an obviously topless teenage girl are shown: her breasts are partially visible but her nipples are not.
Profanity: The script contains three sexual expletives, three terms of deity, and a minor profanity.
Alcohol / Drug Use: Adults drink alcohol at a cocktail party and in a bar. A man takes prescription medication.

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She Came to Me Parents' Guide

Do you think Steven and Patricia’s marriage could be saved? What do you think of the choices they make? What do you think you would do in their situation?

What do you think motivates Tereza’s stepfather’s behavior? What do you think of the choice made by Tereza and Julian? Do you think they had any other option? What would you do if you were Julian’s parents?

Home Video

Related home video titles:

If you’re a fan of Peter Dinklage you can catch him in Cyrano, The Chronicles of Narnia: Prince Caspian or Penelope. Anne Hathaway can be watched in The Princess Diaries, The Intern, Becoming Jane, or Get Smart.

For more movies about composers, you can try Tick, Tick..Boom, a film biopic of Jonathan Larson, who created the Broadway blockbuster Rent. Classical composer and all-round prodigy Joseph Bologne, Chevalier de Saint Georges, has his story told in the lush period film Chevalier. Howard Ashman was a gifted lyricist, who penned unforgettable tunes for many of Disney’s smash hits. Howard is a documentary of his life and career.