Never Rarely Sometimes Always Parent Guide

We understand that abortion is a complex moral issue and that our readers on both sides of the debate have passionately held beliefs. “Never Rarely Sometimes Always” has a pro-choice perspective and is being evaluated on its merits as a movie. Our review is not an endorsement or criticism of anyone’s perspective on the issue of abortion.

The ultrasound technician passes her wand over a pregnant woman’s abdomen. “This is the most magical sound you’ll ever hear,” she says, “your baby’s heartbeat.” I remember the elation I felt when I heard my babies’ heartbeats for the first time and it saddens me as the young woman on screen closes her eyes in misery. She’s 17 years old and does not want this baby.

Never Rarely Sometimes Always is the story of Autumn Callahan (played with awe-inspiring vulnerability by novice actor Sidney Flanigan) and her quest to abort her pregnancy. Since her home state of Pennsylvania requires parental notification for minors having an abortion, Autumn and her cousin Skylar (Talia Ryder) take the bus to New York City where she can have the procedure anonymously.

This is a difficult movie to watch, for several reasons. It’s painful to see a teenager so adrift, so unable to seek support or assistance from her exhausted mother and surly father. It’s hard to watch as Autumn tries to induce a miscarriage by chugging cough syrup, taking vast amounts of vitamin C, or punching herself in the stomach. Listening to Amber gradually disclose her sexual history to the clinic social worker is also wrenching as the issue of consent in her past sexual relationships becomes increasingly murky. I’m sure I won’t be the only viewer to wonder if Autumn’s choices would be different had her life circumstances provided better support.

Beyond the subject matter, this movie is hard to watch because it suffers from terrible pacing. I wonder how a film about a controversial subject can be so dull, so agonizingly boring. The film crawls along like a sedated snail, dragging through the girls’ trip to NYC and their stay there. I understand that Autumn feels vulnerable, lost, and adrift, but prolonged shots on the bus and in subway stations don’t underscore that message – they just put the audience to sleep.

To the director’s credit, this movie avoids the easy trap of demonizing people who hold different beliefs. Never Rarely Sometimes Always is clearly a pro-choice film, but the pro-life women at the pregnancy support center Autumn visits are portrayed as kind and sincere and genuinely interested in helping pregnant women find alternatives to abortion. The women at the abortion clinic are also depicted as helpful, gentle, and respectful. Where this film falls down is in its treatment of men who are depicted, without nuance or exception, as the villains of the piece. There’s Autumn’s simmeringly angry father, the conspicuously absent baby daddy, the predatory boss who kisses the girls’ hands as they pass over the cash from their tills, the customer who hits on Skylar, the persistent guy on the bus who badgers Skylar into sharing her phone number, and the man who leers at the girls on the subway. There is a skin-crawling scene where Skylar lets a guy kiss her so she can borrow money to get back home. The only strings-free support the girls have comes from each other; their nearly wordless, non-judgmental bond anchoring the film.

Parents may wonder if this is the kind of movie their teens should watch and from a content perspective there isn’t much to worry about. There is no explicit sexual content, comparatively little profanity and no violence. There are medical scenes where Autumn’s feet are in stirrups and one where she finds blood on her maxi pad. As a general rule, I believe that teens and adults benefit from watching movies that come from different perspectives, i.e. people who are pro-life should watch something with a pro-choice sensibility and vice versa. After all, if we don’t understand one another, how can we have any kind of civil conversation? Sadly, this movie is so interminably dull that I would only recommend it sometimes or rarely, and only to those with a strong interest in the topic.